Feeling Ill

What a fantastic joy to be sick and alone. You have no support or anyone to tell you to stay at home and rest. It is a pian to have to get up and get yourself organised and noone to bring you in chicken soup. Yes I am moaning but when you are sitting home all weekend with no phone calls you start to feel crap. I know people have their own lives but mine is still here as well and there is a big part missing. It will get better and so will I. Enough moaning, time for chocolate medicine.

Guy Fawkes

Another difficult milestone I am about to attempt. Fireworks was an event we both shared and really enjoyed. It was Terry's job to get the fireworks and he used to go overboard. It was fun and childlike. It was a time to let loose and have pure fun. Now I am braving it on my own. I have friends to share it with but going on your own is never the same. There will be noone to hold my hand, give me a cuddle or reassure me. SO here I go again, alone again naturally!!!

Friends

Why is it when you start to get back on track someone gets put out cause you don't call? Do they call me when I am stuck at home on my own? Do they see if I am alright? No but you must always make time to visit them when you fly home. Come on people you still have your life partners, think about those of us struggling to come to terms with a major life change.

Weekends

This blog is designed for me to vent and maybe others can relate and get some support knowing someone else out there is going through the same things.
Grief is a bugga. It comes up and hits you from behind like a massive wave. You are going along doing normal things and kapow it hits again.
So far I have no answers but I am working on it.
Weekends are the worst. 3 nights on your own and 2 days without the prospect of anyone ringing or visiting. Going to the supermarket is a great way to get some human contact.
I am learning to garden a job my hubby did. I don't enjoy it but I do like the feeling when the garden looks like he used to have it, it cuts abit of stress out of my day.